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Parenting - Massage: The
Right Touch
Real Families, Real FUN: Just For Parents
Massage: The Right Touch
By Elizabeth Kauffman for Real Families, Real Fun
Whether you're the type of person who likes to learn a little
about a subject or someone who goes whole hog, try massage.
Now seen by some as a true holistic alternative medicine,
the types and purposes of massage are varied enough to appeal
to most anyone. An upstate New York teacher says her husband
goes every week for an hour and a half. "He feels this
is one of the only times he is actually able to 'empty his
mind' of the week and finds that very beneficial to his
health and to his productivity at work (as an ad director)."
I was interested in the intimacy and communication aspects
of massage so I checked online and found software, videos,
and books galore! How about a book called 101 Essential
Tips: Massage by LaCroix for under $6 online. Other
recommendations led me to The Romantic's Guide: Hundreds
of Creative Tips for a lifetime of Love for about $15.
There are countless others out there, so just take a few
minutes to surf the web or visit your local book store.
You can try it yourself or pay a massage therapist--make
sure he or she is licensed! Swedish massage is the most
common type, and the focus is relaxation. It's often very
pleasurable. The Massage Book, by George Downing, focuses
on gentle Swedish techniques and is recommended for couples.
According to the American Massage Therapy Association (AMTA),
massage can be as simple as a 15-minute shoulder-and-back
massage while fully clothed (offered in some workplaces)
or as involved as an hour-long head-to-toe body maintenance
treatment. One mom got a salon certificate from her husband
for Mother's Day. She reports, "I had a head-and-neck
massage and a foot massage as part of a pedicure. I would
totally recommend massages. I was so relaxed when I was
finished I think I was slurring my speech. It is so nice
to slow down life's fast pace for a few moments."
Jennifer Kam, a licensed massage therapist, told me that
for couples who want to try massage there are a number of
books with set-by-step guides to massage, and you can feel
safe trying your techniques out on each other. She said
the magic is in touch.
Jennifer emphasized two points. First, when you purchase
a massage for yourself or as a gift, the masseuse should
be licensed. And, second, you or the gift recipient should
present any recent injuries or health concerns to the therapist.
Communication will make the experience the best it can be.
Is the pressure too light or heavy? Is the room warm enough?
Tell the masseuse.
If you're ready to try giving a back massage, here are some
quick tips: In a quiet, comfortable, candlelit spot have
your partner lie down on his/her stomach. Be beside them
with one hand between their shoulder blades and the other
on their lower back. Use slight thumb pressure along the
sides of the spine (NEVER APPLY PRESSURE TO THE SPINE!!!!)
to promote relaxation. Use long strokes down the length
of the back, flaring out at the hips and connecting again
at the neck or head base. Use clockwise circular motions
with fingertips on shoulder blades and close to the spine.
Knead fleshy areas and use thumbs or fingers to apply pressure
to tight areas. Oil will decrease your friction and eliminate
pulling any body hairs!
Peggy LaClair said, "I gave my husband a back massage
and tested him with different massaging tools we had in
the house. We have an electric massager and three of the
hand-held kinds that have wooden wheels on them. Keith said
that my hands with some baby oil was the best, next was
the electric massager, then came the wooden hand-held ones,
one of which he said felt like I had put a squid on his
back!"
If you want scented oil, shop for mood-setting fragrances
like relaxing lavender. Oils can be purchased at bath accessory
stores or online through web sites. I found an 8-ounce Soothing
Whole body massage and bath oil (for all ages and all skins)
advertised for $13.90. Bath and Body Works has many fragranced
oils; Crabtree and Evelyn and the Body Shop carry various
oils, too. Check in the skin care section to find what scents
and products appeal to you.
The New York teacher sums up massaging this way: "I
think a professional massage and an 'each other' massage
are two pleasant, but very different, experiences."
TAKE IT FROM ME:
I bruise easily and my first massage was no exception. I
really do not think it was the fault of the person giving
the massage, and I now know to warn a new masseuse ahead
of time. Some people require a much lighter touch than others.
--Upstate NY teacher
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