FUNNY QUOTES FOR MOMS
Find funny quotes for moms below. Laughter is still the best medicine.
 Inspirational,
funny, thought-provoking, and laugh-out-loud Quotations from Women about Women . . . . . .
. Enjoy!! Laughter is a Great Stress Reducer!
 Funny
Quotes: On Growing Old Gracefully
"Inside every older person is a younger person - wondering what
the hell happened."
-Cora Harvey Armstrong-
"The hardest years in life are those between ten and seventy." -Helen
Hayes_ (at 73)
"I refuse to think of them as chin hairs. I think of them as
stray eyebrows." -Janette Barber-
"Old age ain't no place for sissies". -Bette
Davis- 
"Thirty-five is when you finally get your head together
and your body starts falling apart." -Caryn Leschen-
 Funny Quotes: It's Not Easy Being a
Woman
"Whoever thought up the word " Mammogram "
Every time I hear it, I think I'm supposed to put my breast in an envelope and
send it to someone." -Jan King-
"A few weeks after my surgery, I went out to play catch
with my golden retriever. When I bent over to pick up the ball, my prosthesis
fell out. The dog snatched it, and I found myself chasing him down the road
yelling " Hey, come back here with my breast! " -Linda
Ellerbee-
"You know the hardest thing about having cerebral palsy and
being a woman? It's plucking your eyebrows. That's how I originally got
pierced ears." -Geri Jewell- 
"A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who never owned a
car."
-Carrie Snow-
"Laugh and the world laughs with you. Cry and you cry with your
girlfriends. "
-Laurie Kuslansky-
 Funny Quotes: Motherhood, Wife and Household Duties
"My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first being
hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint."
-Erma Bombeck-
"A man's got to do what a man's got to do. A woman must do what
he can't."
-Rhonda Hansome-
"The phrase " working mother " is
redundant." 
-Jane Sellman-
"You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you
hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy." - Erica Jong-
"I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on."
-Roseanne Barr-
"I try to take one day at a time, but sometimes several
days attack me at once."
-Jennifer Unlimited-
 Funny
Quotes: Who says it's a "Man's" World.....
"I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave
a man I keep his house." -Zsa Zsa Gabor-
"If high heels were so wonderful, men would still be
wearing them." -Sue Grafton-
"I think---therefore I'm single." -Lizz
Winstead
"When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping.
Men invade another country." Elayne Boosler-
"In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man-if you
want anything done, ask a woman." -Margaret Thatcher-
"If men can run the world, why can't they stop wearing
neckties? How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a noose around your
neck?" -Linda Ellerbee-
 Funny Quotes: Laugh Out Loud Funny
"When I was young, I was put in a school for retarded kids for
two years before they realized I actually had a hearing loss. And they called ME
slow!"
-Kathy Buckley-
"I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I
know I'm not dumb . . and I'm also not blonde." -Dolly Parton-
 Funny
Quotes about a View on Life
"Nobody can make you feel inferior without your
permission." -Eleanor Roosevelt-
"If you can't be a good example, then you'll just
have to be a horrible warning."
-Catherine Aird-
"Things are going to get a lot worse before they get
worse." -Lily Tomlin-
"Every time I close the door on reality it comes in
through the windows."
-Jennifer Unlimited-
Funny quotes for moms, click here for funny mom stories
and click here for
inspirational quotes on motherhood.
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